Men: They're Human, Too

Men: They're Human, Too

 

Much is said today about how men treat women, but we rarely hear about how women treat men. We need to admit that as women we are not always in the right in relationship to men. There is a plethora of advice in women's magazines about how to appeal to a man sexually, and how to live with his "male ego." Let's remember that beyond a man's ego and sexuality lies a real human being, a regular "guy." Men know feelings of hurt, embarrassment, failure and tenderness, just as women do.

I overheard a woman recently talking about her husband in a deprecating way while he stood there mute, not knowing what to say. I cringed inside, wishing she would stop telling the personal details and embarrassing moments of his life. This was a human being she was talking about! He was obviously respected by others, but his wife took center stage by getting some laughs at his expense.

A woman's tendency to treat a man as if he has no feelings seems to begin in adolescence, when girls run roughshod over boys' feelings, turning them down for dates and telling everyone that they did, or spitefully making fun of the boy who doesn't return some flirting gesture. We know this is a mark of immaturity, but some women simply don't mature beyond that point.

It is easy to fall into a habit of deprecating humor. If you are constantly using someone in your family or group of friends to laugh about, think it over. "Oh, it doesn't bother him," is not really a valid statement. If he is alive and breathing, he is affected by the words of others as that is part of being human.